Inspiration - Shine Your Light & Pay It Forward!

That is what I felt the day one of my former clients asked me to be her little baby’s Godmother. Not a fairy godmother, thankfully, LOL but a Godmother nonetheless.

In my early 20’s, I used to work in a maternity home for young pregnant women, most of them in their teens. I loved that job, loved working with youth and who couldn’t possibly love all those babies! It was hard sometimes to have to hold back and be “professional” (by that I mean not get too emotionally involved) when you feel a bond with someone and feel like you can truly make a difference in someone’s life.

I remember this one client I had on my caseload who was relatively early in her pregnancy. We’ll call her “Anna”. She was spirited, opinionated and guarded, all the while still wearing her heart on her sleeve. Slow to trust, slow to truly open up and be vulnerable. Slow to really let people in. A young lady who was intelligent, passionate about life, one who wanted to reach for the sky and do the best job she could, no matter the obstacles before her. One who was “real” – a woman who stood up for what she believed in, and would let you know exactly where you stood, good or bad.

I felt a connection to her from the start, like we were one and the same. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I think we were very similar at that point in both of our lives. We weren’t all that far apart in age either. I remember months after she came to live in the home, I had decided to accept a job offer for a different organization and had to say goodbye. This job was starting a few weeks before she was due to give birth. Now, I had worked with many clients during the time I worked in the non-profit sector, and never once cried in front of them, nor felt the need to. But this time was different.

I remember being in her room, and sitting beside her while I told her that I had to move on. She started crying, upset that after letting her guard down and trusting me with her life situation, I was going to leave her. I had actually felt very similar walking in to tell her. I felt like I was letting her down, knowing how hard it had been for her to open up, be vulnerable and trust someone. And in knowing that she really needed a friend and a mentor with all that she was going through in her life. I felt like I was abandoning her. I’m sure she felt that way too. So I let my own guard down, and my “professional” composure. I hugged her and cried along with her.
Fortunately, the job that I moved on to was on a social service help line, where I could receive calls from the public. I gave her my new contact information at the help line and encouraged her to call me anytime she wanted or needed to.

After keeping in touch once she had the baby and hearing about how her and her daughter (who we’ll refer to as Aaliyah) were adjusting to their new life together, I got a call one night from her at work. Lo & behold, she asked me to be her baby’s Godmother!

My first inclination was to decline, after all, in many social service settings, you try not to get too emotionally close and in some cases, it is expected of you. I had always disagreed with this, as I always felt that you can’t teach young people how to show love and compassion in healthy ways if you are unable to properly model it for them. It’s like expecting a parent to parent, if they themselves have never been parented. Sure, people learn the hard way, the wrong way, and sometimes even the right way - whatever way that is, LOL. But I think if you feel like giving a kid a hug, and you think they need a hug, give them a hug! Who doesn’t sometimes just need a hug! We’re so worried about liability these days that we forget to be human.

But my second inclination was much different. My gut was telling me to accept this honour, because I felt it was the right thing to do. And it was what I really wanted to do! I felt that I had truly touched this young woman’s life, and had been one of the few people she could rely on and trust. And I wanted to continue to be that to her and her daughter. I knew that I could follow through on the commitment to be there for Aaliyah and her mother, and I felt it was the right thing to do.

Well, that was about 9 years ago, and we’re still going strong! She is no longer a “former client”, but a dear friend! And although we don’t see each other as often as we’d like, we love to get together when we can and have deep discussions about life, relationships, things that are important to us, or that is going on around us. And share a lot of laughs too! And Aaliyah is doing absolutely wonderful, as is her mother! Anna has done a fabulous job with her and makes me very proud!

Aaliyah was one of the flower girls in my wedding and I just can’t believe how fast the time has raced by! But one of the things I can believe? Is that if you “do the right thing”, it almost always pays itself back and more importantly – forward to someone else!!

So thanks to you – Anna, and for my special Goddaughter Aaliyah for touching my life! You are both major inspirations to me, and though Anna always plays it down when I get all sappy with her about the honour that I feel to hold this special role, I know that she thinks the same! (Or at least I sure hope so! But then again, she would tell me if she didn’t! Remember I said she was “real”?! LOL) I am so very honoured that you continue to want me to share in you & your daughter’s life and that you continue trusting in me!

I am so proud of you for being you and for doing such a great job with Aaliyah and yourself! Good luck in your new business venture and know that I am always here for you guys!

The moral of this story? Pay it forward and do the right thing! The world would be a much better place if we all practiced that a little more often! And in the words of India Arie in her song “There’s Hope” - “Keep shining your light and show the world your smile!”

You can positively affect someone’s life every day just by being you!

***** These views are mine, and mine alone. As with anything, you are responsible for assessing whether this item and/or activity is safe and suitable for your specific needs. InfoMommy does not make any warranties of any kind, expressed or implied, and assumes no responsibility and/or liability for any actions taken as a result of this blog post.*****